this is the blog that doesn't end...

Thursday was probably the single greatest day here. There was some stiff competition from the Great Wall day, Durty Nellies and China Doll night, and bicycling the streets of Beijing...but as it stands now, yesterday is the favorite to win. Can you tell I am in sports mode? There were so many good quotes and moments yesterday I don't even know where to begin. Simply hilarious.

Here is the day in review...

I wake up too early and can't sleep so I decide to go in early with the photo people so that I can play on Olympics facebook. While I am there some of the Chinese cyclists show up to practice. I get my first glimpse at actual cycling. (Sorry no photos, I am not supposed to take them so I didn't.) Lunch was a significant improvement from the day before UNTIL I go to throw my garbage away. Now is a good time to explain the garbage process at lunch. When your 30 minutes for lunch are up you must take your Chinese box lunch over to the "Food Container" and dump any excess food into that garbage. THEN after they check that you have properly performed part one you proceed out the doors to throw away your plastic container, napkin (singular), and any drink bottles. Along with half our posse I go to throw my lunch away. I am dumping my food in with the other excess food, in the appropriate bin mind you, when Amy strolls up behind me and says "You know this is what they will serve for lunch tomorrow." Remember this is a bin half full of rice, some kind of squash thing, green beans, soup, and a pork of some sort, all mushed together in a concoction that looks like something you might throw up. That will forever change Chinese boxed lunches. Thank you Amy.

We did the typical after lunch routine, practiced flash quotes, and press conferences. Today I won a gold medal. I must be a natural. The second great quote of the day comes during mixed zone practice. Andy, our Sports Information Specialist, (WHO, by the way, grew up in Arlington Heights and went to Buffalo Grove for two years before he moved to Colorado CRAZY!) told me to be witty because the British cyclist I was pretending to be is witty. Probably the wrong move on his part, but I decide to run with it. I will give you the complete dialogue for the full effect...

Patrick: What gave you the extra push to lap the field today?
Me: Well, I really had to go to the bathroom. (great quote number two)
(upon hearing me mention having to go to the bathroom Kelsey looks over and chimes in)
Kelsey: Do you always deprive yourself of the bathroom before races?
Me: Yes, it gives me a sense of urgency and really pushes me to move faster so I can get off the bike and go.
Kelsey: Interesting.

I couldn't stop laughing once I walked away. Honestly, I think I should be an athlete here. Not only am I CLEARLY very physically fit (ha) but listen to those golden quotes. You can't get that anywhere. Double ha, aka haha. Anyway, the only bad part of yesterday was that I left feeling very nervous and unsure of myself. I am probably wigging myself out, but I feel like I am not good at this. I can learn all the information really quickly, who's who, what the rules are and such, but I am not too sure how great I am doing at getting the quotes. I am afraid that while I am sitting behind a journalist I will write something down and the next day find out it was completely different from what he had. BLAH. I really just need to stop worrying about it, but that is easier said than done.

Later we watched some BMX, which is the easiest thing in the world to understand and I read a lot of articles. We had decided the day before that all 24 of us would go out to dinner together. Krystyna was a little stressed so Raul took a bunch of us to get drinks first. We journeyed to the last stop on the red line, aka the last place you can get off before you are in the country side and scaling mountains, where we wait for Bob because we are going to his tea house. Bob's brother and assistant show up and the trek begins. We walk down many shady streets, admiring everyone's cute dogs. For some reason, like the children, the dogs are cuter here. Then, after about 10 minutes of blindly following these two people, we walk through the threshold to ultimate shadyville and Eric (one of the Chinese volunteers) says good quote number three. "They are probably taking us some place so they can sell us as slaves to Africa." This might be the best one of the day, but at this point it too close to call. A few dirt roads later we are at this beautiful tea house. Bob gives everyone some sweet tea, melon seeds (delish), and some other random goodies. He has his assistant preform a tea ceremony and then lets a few of us take a shot at it. Leroy was "very professional." Forty minutes later we are hiking back to the train. As we are walking back through the shady building that is full of 5 gallon purified water jugs Lauren says, "This is where they get the water for our room. Legit?" If I had photos of this journey you would understand why that was so hilarious. Just try to imagine a completely run down building full of these jugs and suddenly Lauren chimes in with that statement, which if you are keeping tally is good quote number four.

We load on to the train and go back toward the Velodrome for dinner. Paul had picked out a Chinese place that was only about a 5 minute walk from the train station. Dinner just added to the hilarity that was the last hour of my life. Leroy and Amy picked out the food, it was delicious. We talked sports, politics, and who knows what else. Raul was sitting with us and he mentioned that he has been working at the Velodrome for the last year, every day from nine to five. My response to that "Oh dear God." (I am leaving this off the good quote list, so do not mark it on your tally sheet.) There were a lot of children there, which led me to believe it was a family place, but all of us girls gawked and smiled at the cute babies. Andrea, Krystyna and I took numerous photos and were classified as pedophiles. Good quote five occurred at the other table. Since there is a bit of a language barrier with our Chinese friends they sometimes don't realize that they need to fluff things up before saying them. So Eric turns to Kelsey and says "What's wrong with you." Upon hearing this Li says "Eric that's rude." Eric then says "Well how do I say it? Kelsey are you in a raw mood?" Kelsey took it in stride saying she was simply hungry. I was not there, but just hearing it later had me on the floor laughing. It might also be Andrea's telling of the story that made this so funny, but seriously "raw mood?"

A little while later Eric decides to offer his services as a name translator, but only to the girls. He starts giving everyone names...things like complicated seaweed, green beautiful window, etc. When he comes over to our table Amy asks him what it takes to translate a name. Eric's response, "The one thing is it has to be beautiful because you all are very very beautiful." We all laugh at this obvious pick up line and Ernst, impressed by Eric's skill to lure in the ladies says "Man he is good" and realizes he needs to learn some new tricks. We then make Amy get her name translated to something "Very very beautiful." This is no easy process, when it is all said and done it took him about 10 minutes to give Amy her Chinese name. Eric saunters over proudly with his napkin in hand and delivers the news. This takes longer than the translation. I am fairly certain he said beautiful 4837 times. Ernst and I watched from across the table as Amy tried desperately to not laugh while Eric describes what this all means. And what is Amy's name? Tree, weeds blowing beautifully in the wind, and eyebrow. Other than the name itself, the comical part was Amy reenacting the gestures Eric used while reading her her new name. I decided to translate my name myself, brilliant, awesome, and beautiful (which was a qualification because Eric made sure to have that in everyone's name).

In all seriousness, while I watched him translate the name what he was doing was sounding out the syllables of Amy's name to find words in the Chinese language that made the same sound. There are a number of different ways to translate names, I also saw bookmarks with names on it that were translated using the meaning of the name. Other people talk to you for a while, try to figure out your personality and then translate your name using those characteristics. Regardless of the process, it is still pretty cool, even if Eric uses it as his way to get attention from the lady folk.

Then the train ride. Oh the train. Coming home it is not hard to get seats. A. it is 9:30 and 2. we are out in the boon docks when we are at the Velodrome. Eric continues to hit on Kelsey while I sit completely zoned out on the other side of the train. The last train leaves from the transfer station at 10:30...we get on the last train. There are only four cars and it is pretty packed. I have some man's armpit in my face. Nasty. Kelsey is taking random photos all over the place, and Lauren is going around popping everyone's collar, and buttoning up our polos so that we look ridiculous. We stop at a station and Kelsey turns to get off. She is bouncing all happy to be off the God-awful train, and it is the wrong stop. Instead of using words Lauren and I just pull on her backpack forcing her back on to the train. You probably just had to be there, but it had us laughing for a good five minutes.

I realize this is the longest blog post known to man, but I couldn't justify my initial claim without a full synopsis of the day. I think you can now see that Thursday does in fact rival the other days listed in the beginning of this incredibly long blog.